What do you do when you suddenly find yourself facing widowhood with 3 children under the age of 13 and no established “career” to fall back on? If you’ve watched my very first video, you know that this is my story. 

My first video is important, why? Because it’s my story of widowhood and my drive to be in the financial services industry.  I am a widow, I became a widow at age 40 and 8 years later I am here to help guide other widows and widowers along the path to strength, independence, and progress.  

Touchpoint #1

Immediate goals are the “Have to “ goals. These are the goals that happen the day after the loss and carry through the first year or two. From making funeral plans, to finding life insurance policies, to digging through boxes of paperwork to figure out your spouse’s group benefits.  These are the immediate goals, and let me tell you, they are unfair. You are making big decisions when the world is spinning – but you have to, you need to. They are time-sensitive.

Touchpoint #2

Transitional goals are the “Need to” goals. These are goals that happen after you have experienced the “Year of the Firsts”.  These are the decisions that help set the direction of the next few years:

  • Stay in the house, rent? 
  • Make an improvement to the home? 
  • What can I afford?     
  • How much do I NEED to start saving so that my retirement goals are in order?  

Need to goals help you keep your sanity and help you feel in control of the next few years.

Touchpoint #3

Long-term goals are the “Want to” goals. These goals are for things like: 

  • What does retirement actually look like? 
  • What conversations do I need to have with my kids so they understand what we may qualify for in regards to financial aid for college and how much loan money are they looking at?

Long-term goals might also include blending families. Life does move forward after loss and often love does too.  You want to live together as a family. What does that mean and look like financially to you and your new partner?

So this is our guide path.

Immediate goals are the Have to’s. The stuff you have to get done. 

Transitional goals – about 2 to 4 years after your loss. This is the new reality and how are we managing through it. What has to change so we can live our best life.  These are the Need to’s.

Long Term Goals – about 5 years after loss, when you finally have your groove on.  These are the Want To’s.  What do you WANT this next chapter to look like?  What mark do you want to leave on this world?  What value do you WANT to share with those around you?

If you are reading this and have lost a spouse or partner…my heart goes out to you.  Call me, connect, share your story.  If you know someone who has just experienced loss and you don’t know what to do. My first suggestion is a Meal Train (encourage participants to leave wine when appropriate). Second, I suggest you share my website with them, this is how you can help.  

A trusted advisor is essential when you are moving forward financially during widowhood.

Thank you for joining us for this episode of Widow & Wisdom (your wealth edition), where your mindset and money matter most.